Our top 10 Eurovision 2019 entries

Hi! Hello! Is this thing on? Testing, testing…

Please excuse us for our long absence – we’ve been busy working on a shiny new layout for Mission Eurovision. Now we’re back to share our MUCH AWAITED top 10 entries from this year’s Eurovision!

You’re in for a real treat. Buckle up.

Iceland: Hatari – Hatrið mun sigra

Ana: I mean, it’s just bloody brilliant. The whole Nine Inch Nails thing is totally doing it for me; this is a band that I would travel (somewhere nice) to go and see. I hope they’re not made to tone it down for the live shows, and I can’t believe for the second time in three years I can legitimately Google search for ‘gimp masks’ in the name of Eurovision! AND it’s got a key change, god love ’em. I’m sticking a monkey on this to win now.

Karis: Did you expect anything different from us? Of course this is our winner. I long for the days when Eurovision wasn’t all about perfectly polished pop (Måns, I love you, but what have you done), so this is very much welcome. Will it make it through the semi-finals though? We can only hope.

Portugal: Conan Osiris – Telemóveis

Ana: No one can ever mock my wearing of Skechers Go Walks ever again, Conan has officially made them even more awesomer than I already knew they were. This song, and performance, is all kinds of fabulous. I’ve got a gaming cloak/dressing gown that looks a lot like his costume…

Karis: When this first started I thought “OK Portugal, here we go again…” but then. it. drops. And then he drops. This is so brilliant, and I can’t wait to see how it’s styled and choreographed for the semis.

Australia: Kate Miller-Heidke – Zero Gravity

Karis: I was all set to hate this because I really wanted Courtney Act to represent Australia this year. I can’t, though. Not just because it reminds me a little of Vitas. It’s totally bonkers and grandiose – perfect for Eurovision.

Ana: The staging is incredible, can’t wait to see this performed live. The first couple of times I heard it I was listening in the car, and I genuinely thought it was Montserrat Caballé until I remembered she was dead. Total earworm, BANGER of a song too.

San Marino: Serhat – Say Na Na Na

Ana: Oh Serhat! I wasn’t sure how I felt about this song at first – I think I wanted to love it SO HARD because of how much I loved his entry in 2016 (fnar). The gravelly vocals and disco beats got me again though, and this is a song I love singing along to. Really hoping this makes it through to the finals, even if he isn’t actually wearing a hat this year…

Karis: It was a given this would be on our list based on how much we’ve loved Serhat since 2016 – he inspired our Sloe Serhat Screw cocktail. We’re so happy to have him back! Odds on him reaching the final? Um, well. Let’s see.

Italy: Mahmood – Soldi

Karis: This feels kind of weird for us because we don’t normally go for the awesome pop songs (as mentioned above) but this is too good to ignore.

Ana: Cor, this is a bit moody isn’t it? I have a lot of time for this song, and it makes me want to dance in a way that I am probably too old to pull off with any panache.

Norway: KEiiNO – Spirit In The Sky

Karis: OK, HERE WE GO THOUGH! THIS IS EUROVISION! How did these three come together? It’s such a weird mismatch and I am HERE FOR IT. ALL THE CAPS. Fred Buljo is my 2019 Eurovision crush. Let’s hope he sticks with the pleather for the semi-finals (and not just because it’s on our bingo wink wink). Also, anyone else hear a little of Saraa Aalto’s 2018 entry for Finland in this?

Ana: I’m dancing, I’m smiling, the drums come in and mega BOOSEGUMPS! Quintessential Eurovision this. Has the potential to be an UTTER car crash live, which I think just makes me love love LOVE it all the more.

Poland: Tulia – Fire of Love (Pali się)

Ana: Mission Eurovision is a democracy.

Karis: We’ve battled over this one. Ana absolutely hates it, but this is definitely up there in my top 3. It’s moody and shouty and got that great little groove going throughout. Man alive, I love it. I love them. I want to join Tulia.

Switzerland: Luca Hänni – She Got Me

Ana: I have lost count of how many times I have been in the office/supermarket/park/bathroom and just blurted out “DIRTY DAN-CIN” after listening to this song! There’s a lot about it that I probably shouldn’t like in a Robin Thicke kinda way, but DAMN this is a bop.

Karis: Like Ana, I’ve found myself singing little outbursts of “gettin’ rowdy rowdy” in places that definitely aren’t gettin’ rowdy. This wasn’t in our original top 10, but after hearing it a few more times it’s slowly crept up the list. Who are we to deny a bop like this?

Malta: Michela – Chameleon

Karis: And AGAIN in perfect pop songs we can’t ignore this year, here comes Malta with a slightly whiny but totally excellent banger for summer. We’ve always been fans of “na na” songs in Eurovision.

Ana: This makes me want a mojito. In a good, responsible drinking, way. Solid pop beats, nice bit of horn, and provides a high chance of me trying to pull off the stanky leg.

United Kingdom: Michael Rice – Bigger Than Us

Ana: Well, the UK if we have to have it, but can we have Romania instead?

Karis: Ana’s comment above is from our final email collating our top 10. Sums it up.

OK, OK. There’s nothing wrong with this song. In fact, Michael was by far the best on Eurovision: You Decide, and we’re 100% behind him. It has the KEY CHANGE and the CLAPPY BIT – what more could you want? (Well, some points would be nice pls.)